First,
let me tell you about my day. I woke up at 6:00 am, very early for
me for a Sunday. I took a long hot shower and started getting ready
before my husband even woke up. This never happens. I
woke up my daughter and got her ready for church, this is rare as well. Sundays
are usually pretty tough, to get going, to keep going, and I rely heavily on
Sam to help me as well as take care of Jayde.
We
made it to church an hour earlier than normal, dropped Jayde off at childcare
and headed upstairs for a meeting. After the meeting, we went back downstairs
and took Jayde to her class, then returned upstairs for class…and when class
was over, went back downstairs for the service. I stood for the
majority of praise and worship time and I walked to the front for
communion. After the service we picked
up Jayde again and headed to the truck. Why am I saying all this?
You may not care about my morning routine or the details of my route at
church…but they represent something bigger to me. Because not very
long ago, I struggled just to get to one service. Getting ready wore
me out to the point that I dreaded going. I used a walker and later a
cane to make it to a seat near the back with my husband’s assistance
and there I sat until time to go home, where I would spend the afternoon
resting and recovering.
So
today we sang Never Once by Matt Redman. There could not have been a
more fitting song...
Standing
on this mountaintop
Looking just how far we've come
Knowing that for every step
You were with us
Kneeling on this battle ground
Seeing just how much You've done
Knowing every victory
Was Your power in us
Scars and struggles on the way
But with joy our hearts can say
Yes, our hearts can say
Never once did we ever walk alone
Never once did You leave us on our own
You are faithful, God, You are faithful.
Looking just how far we've come
Knowing that for every step
You were with us
Kneeling on this battle ground
Seeing just how much You've done
Knowing every victory
Was Your power in us
Scars and struggles on the way
But with joy our hearts can say
Yes, our hearts can say
Never once did we ever walk alone
Never once did You leave us on our own
You are faithful, God, You are faithful.
A while ago, I couldn't sing
this song because I would cry tears of sadness. I felt alone and life was
extremely tough. I imagined being able to sing and mean it someday, but could
only keep climbing. Today I couldn't
sing it because I was crying tears of thankfulness. Today was a long awaited
mini-mountaintop. Of course reflecting from on top of a climb is easier.
There were struggles,
there were scars, some are still healing, but now I can look back over the
past couple of years and see how far I've come physically, emotionally,
spiritually…because of how much God has done. God was faithfully beside me/us
every step of the climb.
I am not guaranteed consistent
days like today, I will face valleys and more tough hikes due to the
repercussions of the stroke and the nature of the illness I live with (hence
the lengthy delay of the second edition of this blog). But as much as I
have dreamed of days like today over the past 2 years, it indeed feels amazing
to have this view!!
Words cannot express my
thankfulness to all of you who have prayed for me and our family. God
is good. God is faithful.
After church today, my little
family enjoyed lunch out and I took a mile long walk.